The Sucks Series

Gimme Five: More 1980s fusion albums that don’t, you know, suck

Gimme Five: More 1980s fusion albums that don’t, you know, suck

A couple of years ago I set out to shine a light on stellar fusion records in a decade where the genre started running out of ideas, passion and gumption.

Gimme Five: 1980s songs where Paul McCartney didn’t, you know, suck

Gimme Five: 1980s songs where Paul McCartney didn’t, you know, suck

Paul McCartney had always been cuffed around for the times when he got too cute or — worse, really — too domestic. Yet, until the 1980s, he’d always possessed an unerring sense of hitmaking magic.

Gimme Five: Sammy Hagar songs with Van Halen that don’t, you know, suck

Gimme Five: Sammy Hagar songs with Van Halen that don’t, you know, suck

We’ve been excoriated by fans of Van Halen, after the band’s Sucks Series entry somehow ignored Sammy Hagar. This new list, of course, won’t help. Still, we’d like to make the argument for those times when Van Hagar was pretty good.

Gimme Five: Songs where the Rolling Stones, well, sucked

Gimme Five: Songs where the Rolling Stones, well, sucked

Like most fans, we were hoping the Rolling Stones would pull out some deep cuts as they convened to celebrate five decades of debauched rock. What we got, however, was “Emotional Rescue”

Gimme Five: Songs where Led Zeppelin, well, sucked

Gimme Five: Songs where Led Zeppelin, well, sucked

It’s become fashionable to like Led Zeppelin again, after the release of their 2007 partial reunion concert. Luckily, Celebration Day, which debuted in the Billboard Top 10 last fall, doesn’t include any of these duds.

Gimme Five: Songs where the Beatles, well, sucked (again!)

Gimme Five: Songs where the Beatles, well, sucked (again!)

We called “All You Need Is Love” a pasted-together goof, “The Long and Winding Road” a devastatingly maudlin bore. And you ripped us to shreds. Now, we’re back for more.

Gimme Five: Songs where Van Halen, well, sucked

Gimme Five: Songs where Van Halen, well, sucked

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ytGPMfbZcs0&w=500&h=305] Criticizing Van Halen for the times it were too corny or over-the-top almost feels disingenuous. After all, the band’s legend was founded on their blend of dizzying virtuosity with pervy jokester asides.

Gimme Five: Songs where Fleetwood Mac, well, sucked

Gimme Five: Songs where Fleetwood Mac, well, sucked

When looking for entries by Fleetwood Mac in Something Else! Reviews’ regular Sucks Series, there was plenty of blame to go around. After all, more than dozen different songwriters have moved through the band’s ranks.

Gimme Five: Songs where Bob Dylan, well, sucked

Gimme Five: Songs where Bob Dylan, well, sucked

It is fair to say that the most difficult comparison Bob Dylan ever faces is with his former selves. Still, over the years, there have been some selves that were undoubtedly worse than others.

Gimme Five: Solo Beatles records that, well, sucked

For all of the promise that greeted their time apart — we’ll get four Beatles albums a year now! — the reality was far different as Paul McCartney, John Lennon and George Harrison embarked on solo careers.